At the end of every year, I like to go back through my journals and see what happened that year and beyond, and make sure that I am on track with my original goals. I write nearly everyday, but only a few selections ever make it out onto this blog or in print somewhere. What I love to see over the last few years in these journals, is how this entire idea grew. I was reading something I wrote while I lived in Onekama, that really hit me. I was writing about the incredible lonely feeling I had while working on that house and fighting the township to keep the wind generator that they told us was in violation of their ordinance. How does someone find the courage, energy, and will to survive something like that? I had a smaller support group then, and I will never forget how the Great Lakes Renewable Energy Association stepped up and made sure I was equipped with the right knowledge to fight this problem.
Imagine a time where you are trying to discover yourself, a time, when your spirit is crying to be free. A time that would forever define the person you want to be and will ultimately become. As I lived in that unheated 'white shack' over that Winter, I had to tell myself over and over again to "not quit". I knew that building the Onekama house would lead to great things, not just for me, but for the entire industry. The morning I left for Onekama, I said to my wife at the time, "Well, I have to go to Onekama now to seal my fate." As I left everything I knew and loved behind, I embarked on an epic journey, a journey filled with joy, accomplishment, loss, and pain. Onekama helped me become the person I am today, I had to become a man, almost overnight. I will remember the great times we had up there forever, and that is one of the great gifts that I got to pick up on my journey.
As I mentioned in an earlier post here, I have had to do some serious soul searching lately. It seems that my original idea of building the most cutting edge houses on the planet and helping people to live a sustainable life had derailed somehow. I was spending as much time dealing with bad things as I was dealing with good things. I was never alone over most of the last year, it seemed that every time I came home for my 24 hours rest, someone was standing in my driveway with their hand out, or telling me how I should run my business. This started to get old. I was no longer existing to build the most cutting edge houses for research and amazing homeowners, I was existing to keep a huge work force working so they could get paid every week. I felt so important to be what everyone was calling me, "amazing", that my vision was clouded. Then, one day it happened.
Not long ago, a person saw me drive by as I tried to get home undetected. This person runs a business that I used and he and I had had differences over their taking care of customers and issues that come up along the way. He is the kind of person that sees only fault in others and not in himself. As I stepped out of my truck that day, in my driveway, I heard the familiar sound of a vehicle pulling in behind me. He got out and took 2.5 hours of my time, of my 20 hours at home, to tell me everything that was wrong with me. He told me that what I was doing was not worth it. I have written about this confrontation, but I have to bring it back up for a moment. See, I was digging so deep around that time to find the reason why I was doing what I was doing. He came into my yard and was about as rude as anyone could be, and I just listened and figured out my new direction while he flapped his gums. I must admit, he crossed the line a few times, and I advanced on him at one point, that is when I knew he was not a man at all, he was just another vulture. Its interesting to see someone like that, a money hungry jerk. I never touched him, just puffed out my feathers and read him the riot act about talking like that in my driveway. I went on and on, to the point that the neighbors brought their kids inside. I grew that day, and learned, finally, why I was doing what I was doing.
Team Hybrid is a great idea, there are some great companies and people involved with it. However, there is a problem with it that I see, that I am having a hard time with. I have had people tell me that I am 'messing up the team'. They normally say this to get me to do something. This makes me laugh, because, I started this Team with the guys in Onekama who worked with me and lived with me for months there. The idea of growing Team Hybrid was concocted with the help of Steve's homemade wine and trips to the Cabbage Shed in Frankfort. I am happy with how things have turned out with Team Hybrid, but I wish now, that I would have spent all that money marketing Hybrid Homes, instead of Team Hybrid. I did that, because I wanted to let people know that the only way to consistently achieve incredible feats, is to form a team and do it as a group. Over the last year, I removed several people and companies from Team Hybrid. Companies and people who did not live up to the expectations of me, the coach, the environment, and most importantly, the homeowners. I am happy with that decision.
As things calm down, I am happy to be refocused. Last year at this time, I was managing 7 projects. It was also a lonely time. As long as there was money to be made, I had lots of friends. When there would be hiccups in the financing from banks, I was an outcast. It was difficult, because the company was not equipped to handle that much work. I am still digging us out of that.
The current projects that we have going on have helped to change my mind back to where it was when I started. I don't feel alone anymore, knowing that so many people out there are excited about what I am leading. I have had a chance to stop and smell the roses now, instead of just passing them by at 80 mph. Both Delton and the Earth Shelter Project up North, has helped me to realize what my true love is and why I started this business in the first place. I am excited for 2010, it will be a year of re-building for me and Hybrid Homes. I will look to continue to thin the herd of dead weight. In this economy, there are so many great qualified people and companies that are willing to help me reached my goals, that now is the time to act.
I know I have said it before, but, thank you all for your support. I hope the videos show you a piece of my life that I love. Have a great Holiday Season, and happy New Year!
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